How You Can Help Others Get Stronger from Stress

As Head of School for Clairbourn, which provides private education for Preschool to Grade 8 students, I read a few interesting studies recently that talked about cultivating resilience and the difficulty of unrelenting stress.

In one of the studies, the author discussed the notion that stress is not necessarily a bad thing. In fact, you need a little stress in your experience to encourage you to make changes. The tension or discomfort of not doing one’s best is what makes us try harder the next time. This is the way stress can actually help us come out stronger or more resilient from challenges. The struggle makes us stronger. 

However, when the stress is unrelenting, it can wear on a person (child or adult). This kind of scenario tends not to strengthen, but to weaken the person involved. But there is a way to ensure the stress is not unrelenting. There are very simple ways to interrupt the stress and give a moment to have the growth and rejuvenation that we all need after a time of struggle. 

In one study, they found clear evidence that the best way to counteract or interrupt stress is with love. I know, it sounds a little sentimental, but the act of hugging, or snuggling on the couch, or having your arm around your child when you read them a story actually makes a physical difference. That hug gives you a physical break from stress. (For those who are interested, the hormone oxytocin that is released during these times of social bonding is sometimes called the “cuddle hormone” or the “love hormone.” This is a biological signal to the body that it is safe and can relax.)

So even in times of prolonged difficulty, taking a minute to hug your child actually helps both you and your child release some of the tension or stress that may be stockpiling. For those of you who are not feeling stressed, the hugs and cuddling will help maintain your equilibrium. 

When your child is acting “prickly” hug them, because they NEED it. When they are frustrated or irritable hug them, because they need it. When you are at your wit’s end, hug them because YOU need it! Apparently the Beatles knew what they were talking about “All You Need is Love!”   

 I am sending each and every one of you a big virtual hug from Clairbourn, because we ALL need it!  (This concept comes mainly from a short book called Childhood, Interrupted by Sanjay Gupta MD) 

Amy Patzlaff, Ed.D.Head of School

Clairbourn School Provides Private School Education for Preschool, Kindergarten, Elementary School, and Middle School Grades | Serving Families in the Pasadena, California, Area and Surrounding Cities (K-12 Private Schools) Clairbourn is a 501(c)3 charitable organization. Click here to request information.

Creating Scholars and Leaders with Heart

Nine Things that Matter – But Only One that Truly Counts!

Head of School Dr. Amy Patzlaff with Clairbourn students from the Fall of 2019

As the Head of School for Clairbourn, caring for our parents, in addition to students and staff, is always on my mind. Recently, an in-depth article from DevelopmentalScience.com caught my eye called, “Pandemic 2020: Will the Kids Be All Right? Lessons on Parenting from 100 Years of Crises.” It contains a lot of helpful explanations and advice for parents dealing with their fears about how to raise children successfully in the midst of so much uncertainty.

Can children go on to lead successful lives and flourish in the face of educational disruptions and great adversity? Research shows that, while there are nine important elements that offer full coverage for children’s wellbeing, the real key to favorable outcomes boils down to one thing, and the good news is, it’s you!

Continue reading “Nine Things that Matter – But Only One that Truly Counts!”

An Important Message of Pandemic Hope from Clairbourn Alumna Tiffany Chang

Tiffany Chang, from Clairbourn’s Class of 2018, sees the opportunities embedded in every crisis. She credits her elementary school, Clairbourn, for the optimistic thoughts that inspired an award-winning video she made for the Center for Future Global Leaders (CFGL) Young Artist Competition. She says, “I will always be grateful to Clairbourn as the school has always taught me to look at the positive side of every situation and to stay optimistic even during the most difficult times. I will never forget the important life lessons Clairbourn instilled in me.”

Over a period of about 2 weeks, fueled by her positive-outlook habits and motivated by her own optimistic actions while staying at home, she scripted, animated, and recorded an artistic video on the topic of “Hope” for the CFGL competition. Her “Leaders of Tomorrow Video During the Pandemic” project was designed for parents and students, and reveals a path out of hopelessness by making a point of looking at the brighter side of the stay-at-home-order and disruptions to normal routines. 

After addressing the world-wide toll on health and the derailment of education in the era of COVID-19, she uses the powerful and repeated reframing question, “What if?” “What if this generation is advanced because of this pandemic?” Tiffany’s project presents 18 reframing questions in total that provide ample reasons for optimism in the face of great hardship. As a result, her project not only delivered on the intended inspiration, but it also won her a $300 prize and a top spot as a national finalist in the CFGL competition.

We invite you to watch her video below, read the transcript that follows, and then learn more about Tiffany’s impressive record of philanthropy and community service:

Continue reading “An Important Message of Pandemic Hope from Clairbourn Alumna Tiffany Chang”

Learning How to Thrive in Hardship

According to an April 2020 Gallup poll, regarding the pandemic’s negative financial, physical, and mental effects, 23% of Americans reported feeling they were already in a mental health crisis or just a few weeks away from having one. An additional 19% felt they could hold out for a few months at best. This is not good news considering no one knows the duration of the pandemic or how long social distancing will need to be practiced.

Clairbourn School has a long history of partnering with its parents to ensure that the whole school community remains healthy, strong, and productive even in times of difficulty. As an educational institution, it is natural to turn to the experts and discover what they have to teach us so we’re mentally equipped for tough times. The good news is, there are plenty of proven ways to bounce back from, or thrive in hardship and break away from frustration, depression, and burnout. The data shows we have the ability to control up to 40% of our happiness, and the strategies we can learn are surprisingly accessible and achievable!

Continue reading “Learning How to Thrive in Hardship”